Unmarried pastors?
- Thread starter elnwood
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Filipe Luiz C. Machado
Puritan Board Freshman
John Stott was anglican.
elnwood
Puritan Board Junior
Yes, he was. But I'm asking about Presbyterians.
GulfCoast Presbyterian
Puritan Board Senior
I have not encountered any unmarried presbyterian pastors. However, I am limited to one church/presbytery.
he beholds
Puritan Board Doctor
I've known of two men who were pastors in the RPCNA before they got married. So there at least have been unmarried pastors in that denom.
Bill The Baptist
Puritan Board Graduate
Many protestant denominations will not call a pastor who is not married, at least not as a senior or teaching pastor. The reasoning behind this is that an unmarried pastor will become distracted by all the single females who will undoubtably be seeking his affections. I can understand their point, but considering Paul's exhortation that those who can remain single should remain single, I think that this policy is impossible to defend biblically.
Edward
Puritanboard Commissioner
I'd answer 'some, but not many' in the PCA. I can think of three that I've personally known over the years. To put it in perspective, I've known about the same number of Black and single pastors in the PCA, although I would think that the singles would constitute a larger universe.
Just though of a fourth who was single when he began his pastorate.
Just though of a fourth who was single when he began his pastorate.
Skyler
Puritan Board Graduate
I think a reasonable argument could be made from the requirement that an overseer be the husband of one wife. The experience that comes from leading one's household could be invaluable in leading a church.
Peairtach
Puritan Board Doctor
My cousin was unmarried all his life and was in the Free Presbyterian CoS and the Associated Presbyterian Churches.
Professor John Murray was unmarried until his old age.
Neil Cameron, noted minister ot the FP Church in Glasgow, was a bachelor all his days.
Professor John Murray was unmarried until his old age.
Neil Cameron, noted minister ot the FP Church in Glasgow, was a bachelor all his days.
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Scott1
Puritanboard Commissioner
As in Mr. Stott's communion (Anglican), so biblical, reformed (PCA), it is very unusual.
Not as a matter of biblical command, but as practical necessity- the ability of the Pastor, Minister, Bishop to minister to those who are married, the norm standard, by the institution God created for the perpetuation of the human race. To set that ordinary exemplary standard before the life of the covenant community.
That's not saying an unmarried person could not be, ever, only that like the gift of singleness- it is the exception, not the rule.
Not as a matter of biblical command, but as practical necessity- the ability of the Pastor, Minister, Bishop to minister to those who are married, the norm standard, by the institution God created for the perpetuation of the human race. To set that ordinary exemplary standard before the life of the covenant community.
That's not saying an unmarried person could not be, ever, only that like the gift of singleness- it is the exception, not the rule.
Marrow Man
Drunk with Powder
The first marriage ceremony I officiated (back in 2005) was for another ARP pastor in the same town. But he was still in his 20s at the time, If I recall correctly. Of course, he is happily married now.
Reformed Thomist
Puritan Board Sophomore
True. On the other hand, being single may enable one be more devoted to his ministry.
TimV
Puritanboard Botanist
No one cares about that
It's expected that a single man become distracted by single women. The reason experienced people normally are hesitant to call single pastors is that one of a pastor's most common duties is marriage counseling, and a lonely woman in a bad marriage and a lonely pastor in that situation usually mix like fire and gun powder. The usual goal is an experienced man with a wife who can supporting him during counseling. It's a rare breed, though, and so exceptions are made.
Bill The Baptist
Puritan Board Graduate
I agree that experience running a household is important and a good test of the ability of an elder, but I think that Paul's requirement regarding being the husband of one wife has more to do with polygamy than with whether one is single or not. I think that there are a lot of great reasons to prefer a married pastor, but I don't think there is a good biblical case for completely excluding a single man who is otherwise qualified.
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No one cares about that
That is a good point, and in fact we could probably come up with hundreds of reasons why a single pastor could run into trouble. Despite this, I still think that we cannot make a solid biblical case for completely excluding all single men from the pastorate. Otherwise we become a church that would deny the Apostle Paul a pastorate were he alive today.
Skyler
Puritan Board Graduate
Perhaps--but still, I think, less effective than one with the support of a caring, praying wife, as a general rule.
Personally, I don't think we can make any case at all, given that Paul was single.
GulfCoast Presbyterian
Puritan Board Senior
Spurgeon was single when he started his ministry.
steadfast7
Puritan Board Junior
In an Asian context, Stott would not have been given a Senior Pastorate. sad.
Grimmson
Puritan Board Sophomore
And possibly Timothy as well, in which who Paul was writing to.
Matt. 19:12 I think should be addressed with this conversation as well.
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elnwood
Puritan Board Junior
This alludes to what I was thinking -- that the emphasis on family and children in Presbyterian theology would make an unmarried senior pastor seem out of place.
A pastor counseling a woman alone is like mixing fire and gun powder whether the pastor is unmarried or married.
Now, I only know what Presbyterianism looks like on paper, not in practice, but I would think that having ruling elders would allow an unmarried teaching elder to focus on ministry of the word and allow the older, more experienced ruling elders to do marriage and family counseling.
reaganmarsh
Puritan Board Senior
Don,
Just curious (I hope this doesn't sound critical; it's not intended as such!) -- how would you differentiate the ministry of the word from marriage & family counseling? One is public teaching/proclamation/application; the other, private.
Just wondered if there's a distinction there that I'm overlooking... As a fellow Baptist, I agree that it sounds nice to have the RE's handle that stuff and let the TE focus on preaching prep!
Just curious (I hope this doesn't sound critical; it's not intended as such!) -- how would you differentiate the ministry of the word from marriage & family counseling? One is public teaching/proclamation/application; the other, private.
Just wondered if there's a distinction there that I'm overlooking... As a fellow Baptist, I agree that it sounds nice to have the RE's handle that stuff and let the TE focus on preaching prep!
elnwood
Puritan Board Junior
In this particular case ... exactly the same way you differentiated it!
SolaScriptura
Puritanboard Brimstone
I like that idea! In fact, let's just have the REs do ALL the counseling all the time - in fact we could have them take over all that "people business" that interfers with studying the Word -and let's dig a tunnel from the pastor's study to the pulpit so that the pastor can sit in his study all week and then just "appear" in the pulpit to deliver the sermon and then, when finished, he could "disappear" and go back to his study for another week.
I think that in the situation where you have a senior pastor who is unmarried, if at all possible you should have at least one married assistant pastor to counsel in situations where a single pastor would run into trouble.
elnwood
Puritan Board Junior
Ummm, yeah, not what I was saying at all. I usually appreciate sarcasm, but this is sadly true in a lot of cases.
Agreed. No man should be left alone with a woman that isn't his wife, sister, cousin, or grandma.
Pilgrim
Puritanboard Commissioner
I know of a 40 something single pastor in the OPC, or at least he is still single as far as I know.
Robert Murray M'Cheyne is another worthy from the past who never married. J. Gresham Machen is another one.
With regard to "Ruling Elders," if more of them did any kind of counseling at all (especially competent counseling) it would be a great improvement. In many churches, whether Presbyterian, Baptist or Independent, too often the "Elder Board" acts as little more than a board of directors and too often includes men who are not apt to teach, contrary to what Scripture dictates.
The above posts noting that a pastor should not counsel a woman alone are quite true. Many a married pastor has fallen into that trap as well.
That being said, I have long suspected that the antipathy toward unmarried men in the pastorate, especially the idea that he can't "relate" is often due to an unstated assumption on the part of the critics that the Scripture is not a sufficient guide in giving counsel and advice. That married men may be better able to relate, there is no doubt. But I can't escape the sense that, at least in my experience, many of the strongest critics of the idea of unmarried men in the pastorate are among the least spiritually minded. In fact, I have known of some of these critics who have turned right around a few years later and crossed the Tiber!
(I put "Ruling Elders" in quotes b/c I'm not quite convinced by scripture that there should be a hard and fast line b/w TE and RE. But that's for another thread and another time.
)
Robert Murray M'Cheyne is another worthy from the past who never married. J. Gresham Machen is another one.
With regard to "Ruling Elders," if more of them did any kind of counseling at all (especially competent counseling) it would be a great improvement. In many churches, whether Presbyterian, Baptist or Independent, too often the "Elder Board" acts as little more than a board of directors and too often includes men who are not apt to teach, contrary to what Scripture dictates.
The above posts noting that a pastor should not counsel a woman alone are quite true. Many a married pastor has fallen into that trap as well.
That being said, I have long suspected that the antipathy toward unmarried men in the pastorate, especially the idea that he can't "relate" is often due to an unstated assumption on the part of the critics that the Scripture is not a sufficient guide in giving counsel and advice. That married men may be better able to relate, there is no doubt. But I can't escape the sense that, at least in my experience, many of the strongest critics of the idea of unmarried men in the pastorate are among the least spiritually minded. In fact, I have known of some of these critics who have turned right around a few years later and crossed the Tiber!
(I put "Ruling Elders" in quotes b/c I'm not quite convinced by scripture that there should be a hard and fast line b/w TE and RE. But that's for another thread and another time.
)
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Reformed Thomist
Puritan Board Sophomore
You don't have to be crazy to be a psychiatrist. Though it helps.
Andres
Puritan Board Doctor
What about his mom?
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